


Back off bitch, I saw him first.

by ifitships_isits



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gay Bar, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-03
Updated: 2015-09-03
Packaged: 2018-04-18 19:35:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4717937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifitships_isits/pseuds/ifitships_isits
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas is like gay catnip.  Dean is allergic to cats.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Back off bitch, I saw him first.

**Author's Note:**

> ok, so this started out as a joke, but now i really like the idea of a three chapter piece. hopefully i'll regroup and flesh out tomorrow.

It started as a typical witch case. Dean hates witches. All creepy and hex bags and fluids. But this one appears different. James had called from his new home and asked for their help. Turns out a small coven of witches in a nearby town had heard of his connections to hunters, and rather than wait until they showed up to investigate the rash of deaths, the coven had asked James to call someone who might not shoot first and count hex bags later. Sam was currently interviewing the elder of the group, a 96 year old woman who "'Still made her own butter, and love spells" she said with a wink in Dean's direction.   
Dean gave a strained smile at the old lady, while Sam carefully tried to change the subject.  
"Oh, not for myself, of course," The old lady giggled, swatting at Dean's hand. Dean started to blush, barely able to not look at Cas, who was examining the shrunken head sitting on the mantle. Sam gave up trying to ask questions and stood up. "Can you direct me to the bathroom?" He asked. It was their typical cover to sneak around the house for clues. Dean caught the phrase they had set up to start distracting the mark. The old lady laughed.   
"The room you're looking for is the first door on the right. Feel free to poke around, I know how you hunters get. I have nothing to hide." Dean schooled his face to look innocent, but Sam looked guilty. Cas was still looking thru the knickknack on the mantel.   
The old lady pipped up. "You may not want to poke at some of them, the wards are up there for a reason." Cas quickly pulled his hand back, knocking over a cat figurine. "Oh, I'm so sorry." Cas says gently righting to little glass kitten. Dean looks at the old lady. "Do we need to be worried about anything?" He asks pointedly.  
The old lady laughed. "Gods, no. And as long as the tall one doesn't piss off the cats, you guys should be fine." Sam comes back into the room, an orange tabby curled up in his arms. Sam was grinning and rubbing its belly.   
"Melinda, who ARE these charming men who have invaded our quaint little berg?" A small, grey haired man, dressed in an impeccable white suit strait outta "Midnight in the garden of good and evil" and topping it off a mint julep in his well manicured claws. Dean rolled his eyes. The gay ones always hit on him. Happened all his life. The walking southern stereotype stepped out from behind Sam, and in doing so, goosed Sam. Sam let out a displeased grunt, and cat in his arms hissed and batted at the stranger.   
"Vernen, these were the hunters I was talking about. The coven knows they are here. These young men will be investigating that sweet little boy Howard's disappearance. " The man waved dismissively, turning his nose up at her. Then he noticed Cas standing at the mantle, and his eyes grew wide. He virtually pounced across the room, Getting a little too close to Cas for Dean's comfort. Everything about this man was irritating, Dean thought to himself. His nose started to itch as the man pawed over Cas.   
"You have such lovely wings." he said, his eyes flashing between cat and human.   
Dean stood up fast, ready to throw this little shit across the room. What the fuck was he doing touching Cas. In a flash, The man transformed into a sleek black cat with a gold belled collar. It wrapped itself around Cas's legs, doing figure eights around his ankles. Dean feels a firm grip on his arm, turning in supirsed the old lady still has that kind of power to her. Melinda gives him a gentle poke.   
"Now, now, it's a natural reaction. I guess I should probably warn you. Most of our familiars are cats, and if you're hiding something, you know, magical, it won't really be a secret. Cats can see all kinds of things humans can't. Millie, the one that tall one has befriended, is mine. Vernen is my daughter's. They make quite the vicious team when it comes to critiquing debutantes and garden parties, but otherwise, completely harmless."   
Vernen climbed up Cas's trench coat and wound himself around Cas's neck like some kind of fur scarf. Cas reached up and rubbed the cat under his chin.   
"It's fine, Dean." Dean pouts, either because he can't find a way to throw a cat across the room without looking like a dick, or that he is missing out on seeing Cas's wings.   
The old woman gives him a mischievous look. "Now boys, " she paused as all heads turned towards her, "If you expect to get around this town, you need an advantage. I can make it so that one of you can see magic like our cats can." She walked over to Sam, carefully collecting "Millie". "I think that it might be helpful considering the circumstances. I suggest you brace yourself, young man. " She says, looking directly at Dean. The cat figurine on the table started to glow.

******************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************

 

Dean woke up in the hotel, curled up in what seemed to be Cas's coat. He rubbed his face against it. A little wisp of a feather flew loose, Dean's eyes following the almost invisible fluff as it shifted in the wind currents of the room. As he followed it, Sam stepped into his line of sight.   
"Are you ok? What did that old hag do to you?" He mutters to himself " James better be right about this." Dean rubbed his face with his hand, sitting up and unwrapping the coat from around himself. He gathered it in his arms, picking at a loose thread, and looked around the room. Dean felt fine, if not a little better. He stood up and stretched. A shiver ran through him, pleasant as he turned his body and arched his back.   
"Don't sweat it Sam. I kinda feels like that talking to animals spell. I can totally handle it. Just promise not to get me fixed, and I won't have to pee in your suitcase." Sam smirked. He remembered a weekend they had stayed at Bobby's. A stray Bobby had been feeding had somehow gotten into Sam's suitcase and used it as a litter box. Dean had thrown a fit, along with sneezing up a storm. It was how they discovered he was allergic to cats.   
"Hey, does this mean you're allergic to yourself?" Sam asks. Dean takes a whiff of his own forearm. He doesn't sneeze, but he does get a sudden urge to lick his arm. He stops himself before this could get even more embarrassing.   
"Where's Cas?" Dean asks, finally noticing he isn't in the room.   
"He's taking Vernen home. Millicent said you would sleep for about an hour, then wake up with the talents of a familiar. It will last about three days. We hope." Sam cleared his throat. "James better be right about that. I called him right after you passed out. He said it's a spell to allow a witch to switch abilities so she can understand the world of familiars. He can undo it if necessary, but the old lady thinks it will be helpful. Cas even agrees. Of course, it means you have to be careful. You took on some interesting characteristics when the spell was cast."  
Dean looks at him and blinks. Licks his lips.   
"Like what?" Dean asks nervously, turning to the mirror. 

Ears. Dean had cat ears.


End file.
